My Mom and I went on a Women's Retreat with her Church this weekend. It was full of ups and downs for me. I think I'm still processing!
I should back up by explaining that Mom's Church is the Church I grew up in. I went there for years and years, and was really involved for most of that time. Life changes though.
There were a couple of reasons I stopped going there. It wasn't that I had anything against God, Church, or that Church in particular really... Well, at least, not as far as the people or the beliefs went. I struggled with attending once they built the new Sanctuary. I don't know what it was, but something in there tended to set off my asthma. So I spent several years attending church services from the lobby. Yah, not exactly my favorite. I stuck with it though cuz I never really had a good reason to go somewhere else. Health problems and work go in the way of attending at times too. Then I got married and started going to a small Church with my hubby, so it's been several years since I've been there.
I was excited about going to the retreat and getting away from my day to day life, but I was a little nervous about seeing people I hadn't seen in years. You see, I've changed a lot since "back in the day." I've been sick and between just general lack of energy because of that and the meds, I've gained a lot of weight!
So guess what? I was right, there were a lot of people who didn't recognize me. Even one or two who completely didn't remember me at all :(
On the plus side there were some people that were really nice to talk to, and it was good to spend the time with my Mom! I also walked away from the retreat with lots to think about. Some really good suggestions from friends new and old, and with old connections reformed. I'm very thankful for that.
I learned that I'm really going to have to work at being comfortable in a crowd again. I used to be Miss Personality, and this weekend I was Miss Hide Outside because I got claustrophobic.
I also learned that taking lots of turns on the freeway with a migraine is bad. Puking on the side of the road is also not fun. Don't worry, Mom was driving.
And lastly, I was reminded that I'm not alone is this fight, unless I hide from everyone else.
2 comments:
*lots of hugs!* I'm glad your mom was there, though- that probably helped, right? But I totally understand about being uncomfortable around people.
That was a great step you took. Hopefully it'll get easier for you.
*hugs*
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